As the conversation continues on yesterday’s post about whether or not I should (and can) make the leap from working mom to SAH, the conversation has to veer slightly toward my part-time dream job for TV Fanatic.
I need some help from my friends.
Tonight I’ll start covering Real Housewives of Orange County for their sister-site The Hollywood Gossip.
Except I know nothing about these women as my allegiances are firmly with Team Smalls and Kim over at the Atlanta housewives.
(I mean, MAYBE we talk about these women like we know them. And we certainly go “OMG! WE KNOW THAT PLACE!” when they roll past in their Escalades and Bentleys on the show. And by WE I most certainly mean me AND DAN since he’s the reason I started watching those crazy bitches friends in the first place.)
So, to lighten things up around here, I need a crash course!
Who are the villains? Who are the heroes? Who’s had the most plastic surgery? Who’s married for money and who’s married for love? Are any of them even married?
(Only two of the Atlanta housewives are currently married on the show, though three are married in real life. And one of them, I think, has never been married and is still a housewife. o_o )
Tell me everything you know about the Real Housewives of Orange County. Ready…set…GO.
You need to buy all 7 (I think it’s 7 now?) seasons and take a week to watch them. There is toooo much history to sum everything up.
ZOMG! I almost just hyperventilated thinking about watching that in the span of 5 hours!
It’s such and addicting show you will love it AND you will understand the women better then just getting a recap from us. The relationships this season are changing and it would probably be helpful to know how things were before to have a full grasp on what’s happening now. I know the thought of watching a bunch of season seems overwhelming when you work and have kids, but it will totally be worth it!
Actually, each of the seasons has a reunion show where they go over all of the past drama. It may be less daunting and time consuming to just watch the reunion shows.
I’d add in my summary of the characters, but it’s hard to write something like that without bringing your personal opinion into it 🙂
Check out RealityTea as well- she gives good summaries of the shows and her past blog posts may give you good insight- obviously she has her own opinions of each of the ladies, but I think she gives a fair assessment of the shows.
BEWARE: Brain cells WILL BE HARMED in the making of this project. Just making a note on your blurb about some of the “housewives” being divorced/single/separated/not married. Don’t you think it would make for a much more interesting season if the housewives were forces off the show if their status was changed to any of the aforementioned? Sorry, but to show a real housewife, there actually needs to be some display about how the children are disciplined, how the laundry is done, how things get mailed, and how they keep a business going all at the same time. Otherwise, these shows are just about self promotion and you end up with something like Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Let’s take Brandi’s elopement into consideration for a second. How do we know that she was not offered a spot “if only she would get married and then divorced?” Also, let’s not forget Bethenny Frankel of the RHNY who now has shit selling EVERYWHERE……and last but now least Kyle Richards who was mentioned by Bethenny in a reunion episode of WWH (Watch What Happens) like she was the next hottest thing. THINK FOR YOURSELVES, PEOPLE. THESE SHOWS WILL DRAIN YOUR SOULS…..and your brains……and probably cost the future of your firstborn if you spend too much time watching these instead of nurturing your children.
These shows will drain your souls if you let them. If you watch them for the ridiculous, over-the-top displays of drama that they are and keep a firm grip on the knowledge that this isn’t how the vast majority of us live, I think you’re good.
As to your last sentence, I hope you’re not implying what I think you’re implying–that my child’s future is doomed because I’m watching this. I can assure you it’s most certainly not. I get paid to watch and write about these shows. I’m not shirking my responsibilities as his mother and plopping him in front of Bravo.
Vicki – self made millionaire through selling insurance, is in the midst of divorcing her second husband, often seen as an “aggressor” by the other women (but I think she just calls it like she sees it), the only original wife left
Alexis – devoted trophy wife and mother, very Christian but yet displays her “bubbies” for all to see, kind of a ding dong, trying to start her own dress line, LOTS of plastic surgery, always seems to be trying to keep up with the proverbial Jones.
Tamra – divorced mother of four, a spitfire who tends to cause drama, on and off friends with Vicki but has always had it out for Gretchen
Gretchen – never married but dating Slade Smiley, has her own purse and make-up line, used to be engaged to a much older millionaire who passed away from cancer, also calls it like it is and often is engaged in the drama because of it
And then there is a new one that is married to a plastic surgeon….
This is fabulous! So helpful!
And if knowing all that wasn’t bad enough……if you need some help getting acquainted….
http://www.lynnnchicago.com
http://www.stoopidhousewives.com
Now excuse me while I go and get a life. 🙂
I’m going to need to bookmark these, I think, so that I don’t have to keep looking at Dan and going “QUICK! What was Vicki’s husband’s name? Google that for me, wouldja!?!”
Vicki is just annoying. She uses the term “woo hoo” 1,000,000 times a day when she is drinking and it drives me bonkers.
That’s all I have for you…
Woohoo! 😉
Thanks!
Hi Miranda,
Congrats on doing the Housewives of OC. I review pretty much all of the rest of the Housewives for The Hollywood Gossip site. I’ve never watched this one and I just don’t have the time to fit it in so I’m glad you’re doing it.
Are they having you do the + / – points system with your review? Steve started that and fans seem to like it.
My only advice is to see if you can watch a couple of the last episodes from the previous season. Bravo will probably be showing them today. That way you’ll have a bit of background to go on. Other than that just have fun with it. You’re basically getting paid to make fun of these ladies and they make it pretty easy.
Enjoy yourself and if there’s anything I can help you with just let me know.
Christine
Twitter: @ProudTVJunkie
I feel like I should’ve tidied up a bit before I brought home people from work!
Yes, I’m doing the +/- system, so I’m excited about that. Making fun of them will be no problem! I really just wanted to know a little about who I’d be making fun of first so I didn’t spend the whole episode trying to figure out who’s who.
Thanks for the help!
I am SO your girl for this.
I’ve watched since the beginning.
Vicki is the only original member left. She’s high needs. Like a baby who has colic. She was on her 2nd marriage. Very unhappy. Always talked about her tank being empty. Has 2 kids. Girl who’s a nurse. Probably the most normal on the whole show. Son who’s a lazy ass and just mooches of his mom and works for her mom’s company. Owns an insurance company and is self made. Very hard worker to a fault.
Alexis and her husband have the type of marriage where he’s the boss. Very traditional. Like he’s her master. She has 3 kids with a set of twins. At one point a few years ago she had 2 nannies for 3 kids. Took her 18 month girl twins for a manicure. Like at the salon. She likes to work out so right there she annoys me. Started her own clothing line. She was the model for it.
Tamra. Oh my does that girl have spunk. Probably the most like me. Has quite the mouth and says how she sees it. Gets her in trouble for sure. Probably the best sense of humor. Dating a hot younger guy after her marriage broke up. Has 4 kids one adult one from first marriage. He’s sort of a drifter and causes issues. Used to be a real estate agent.
Gretchen. Got on the show and at the time was engaged to an 80+ year old. He died. He left her some money but not like millions. Left her his house. She’s been dating this Slimy Slade. Slade has also dated 2 or 3 other Housewives. I dont’ get it. He’s sort of in a custody/child support mess with his ex. Gretchen started a make up line. Maybe handbags too. She’s peppy and the only one that doesn’t have fake boobs. I don’t mind her much but she can be pretty catty.
Then there’s a new girl. We’ll see what drama she brings.
This is amazeballs. Just like you.
Oh. As far as allegiances: Vicki and Tamara tend to stick together. Gretchen and Alexis have hung together some but it doesn’t seem like they’re super close. Gretchen and Tamara pretty much go at each other every year.
This is helpful, too!
But apparently this year Gretchen and Tamra are buddies much to the chagrin of both Slade and Vicki.
Ugh. Curse you Andy!!! Why do I know all this junk!
They refer to Gina too. Gina was a housewife who I liked but she was a bit of a meddler. Got into everyones biz. She is a realtor for that area and does quite well. She is team Slade for some reason and that causes issues with Tamara.