What would I do without y’all?
I sat here at this table with my broken laptop and I cried and emotionally vomited all over you all and you wiped it off, held my hair back, and then got me a wet-nap and a toothbrush. Because that’s what friends do.
(Unless you’re my friend Amanda who once dumped the contents of my trashcan into my TOILET because I said I thought I was going to hurl after a particularly awesome night at the TEP house causing me to wake up in the morning to find discarded razors and dental floss and other “stuff” in my TOILET which I had to scoop it out with a serving spoon because I need to pee and didn’t want to wake my roommate by using her bathroom instead.)
Oh. I’m better now.
Dan read the blog within minutes of it going live and by the time I went into my room to lay down, he was sending me text messages that said
He needs to go back to daycare tomorrow and Friday if possible.
Please. You need it and it’s cheaper than a sitter. I will take him and pick him up. Make sure it’s good with them.
I’d take the dog if I could too. I bet she would have a blast with all those kids.
And go get a mani-pedi and eyebrow wax
And then he said something and I said something and before I knew it we were quoting lines from Back to the Future II and I was laughing. Which is only one of the reasons I love this guy. No matter what, he can always make me laugh. Always.
And then I sent a text to our daycare to find out if there was a spot for him tomorrow. And they do, so he’s going.
I’ll have moments where I feel awful about it because it’ll seem like I’m doing nothing of consequence and he should just be with me because I’m his mother, but at the end of the day when my boys get home and my mind is recharged and my soul is refreshed (and my toes are freshly polished…) I’ll know that this was for the best. That we needed this day apart.
We’re not a dynamic duo of stay-at-home-awesome, no matter how much part of me may want that sometimes. I think that in throwing myself into this temporary-SAHM gig, I’ve tried to forget that this isn’t our normal to pretend, maybe. To try this on.
We’re not used to this, Joshua and me.
Couple that with the 12 days straight Dan worked, the horrible sleep we’ve had for the past several nights, the raging diaper rash that will.not.quit., and the fact that I don’t take care of myself in the summer and you have a recipe for that I post I wrote earlier today about those feelings of being not good enough.
I am good enough. I know that. I was picked to be his mother and he was picked to be my son.
I especially know that after a good nap, an awesome husband, fantastic
readers friends, and some pampering to look forward to.
So, I’m better. And I’m thankful.