When I go anywhere, I’m a pretty meticulous packer. I make a list of what I’m taking with specific item details. The list doesn’t just say “black dress.” It says “faux wrap black dress with five buttons.” (Also? I laugh and roll my eyes when Dan does this. Because he takes my OCD packing nature to a whole ‘nother level.)
When I need to tightly pack many things to save space, I can do it easily. I’m the master of having no dead space. Just ask my roommates about my BlogHer swag and how I got that home. They can vouch for my awesome packing skills.
What I do not remember packing for BlogHer–or even remotely thinking that I needed to pack–is this:
Yeah.
Yes. Yes that is what you think it is.
Yes. Yes I am just as shocked as some of you are.
When I took the test on the Monday morning after BlogHer, I took it kind of on a whim. I was on day 52 of what I thought was an anovulatory cycle. I knew that if I planned to call the doctor around day 60, they’d ask me if I’d tested. So, I grabbed the pee stick out of the cabinet and before I even had a chance to wipe, two lines were there.
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I kind of laughed in disbelief. Shook the test. Looked again. Yep. Still two pink lines.
Dan was getting Joshua dressed for school so I went into the nursery, pee stick in hand, and when he asked why I had such a funny look on my face, I showed him the test. Shoved it at him, actually. He did the same shocked, disbelieving laugh as me and then high fived me. (What? You don’t high five your spouse over surprise pregnancies?! Oh, wait, you don’t HAVE surprise pregnancies? Yeah. Me neither.)
I wish I could say I immediately did back flips and let out a SQUEE! of joy. But I just kind of went through the morning in complete shock. And the rest of the day. And the day after that. And the day after that.
That shock has been the reason for my radio silence lately. Until we knew some dates, we didn’t want to tell our families. And until we told our families, I couldn’t really write about this. And without writing about this, I’ve been left with zero ways to process this aside from in my own head. Which is a facking awful place for anyone as it turns out.
And as it turns out, I’m pretty much terrified.
SQUEEEEEE!!!!! I have been waiting for this post forever – congrats again! I am thrilled for all 3 of you!
And you’re going to be ok – it will all work out – it always does. I know it’s cliche but really – I believe it.
Lots of love and hugs your way. You are going to be a fantastic second time mom.
I know it’ll work out. I know. It’s just scary as Hell.
i love you.
come hold my pregnant hand.
I love YOU. So come hold MY pregnant hand.
YAY! You’re bloggy out. I’m with Diana that I’ve been anxiously awaiting this post. I was so happily shocked for you & am still so happy for you & your family. Much love!
Thanks, Suz. I’m glad you two were blog stalking me for this!
Those are some bright lines! No doubt about that, you can’t shake those away. I am very happy for you. It is definitely a scary time, wondering what it will be like with two (not that I am doing that right now, *cough, cough*) I wish you a very happy and healthy pregnancy!
RIGHT? Super bright. And HOLY FAST. They came up so quickly! Thank you.
You can do it sister! We’re here for you and will help you through! Congratulations.
Thanks, Katherine!
Oh! Congratulations? Yes! Congratulations! All will be well.
All will be well in time. Letting that time elapse will be the problem.
Congratulations! 😀
Thanks!
First off congrats. I know it may not seem like a “yay, so happy, congrats” type of time, but it really is a blessing 🙂
Secondly, just to echo what I said via twitter; you will do fine and we are all here for ya.
I know it’s a blessing. Deep down, I know that. It’s just maybe the most terrifying blessing imaginable.
Congratulations! I can’t imagine the shock of that and trying to process it all in your own brain. You will be great at this.
Um, it was freaking hard. Too hard. WAY. I do not recommend it.
I find in moments like this it’s best to say, “HolyCrapYouAreHavingABaby!!”
I can’t promise it won’t be full of nausea, stretch marks, pains and bizarre body functions-
But it has one hell of an upside.
Congrats, my friend.
Now go eat some ice cream.
“HolyCrapYouAreHavingABaby” about sums it up. And oh my god the nausea.
you are going to rock this. It will be so different and you are going to rock this!!! And I’m here to prop you up if you start to feel wobbly, promise. Congrats!!!!!!!!!!!
I already feel wobbly! Where are you!!?
Crap I’m at work… HOLD ON, I’M COMING!!! 🙂 (think Sam and Dave? With Music?)
I don’t know if I ever knew the next line was “I’m coming.” Until now, of course.
I’m sorry if my wife knocked you up at BlogHer… who knew?
Congrats!
I think Katie and I should patent this baby and get rich so we don’t have to work anymore.
If you patent this baby, could you send some of Katie’s pregnancy juju my way? Clearly the woman has some seriously powerful baby stuff!
Right? Her baby stuff is all sorts of magical.
Oh I have so been there. I think I stared at a wall for about 2 hours after my positive pregnancy test.
But you know what? The shock fades and the joy and anticipation seeps in. (And for me the dread of being pregnant. Oy.)
Turns out there’s room for LOTS of feelings at one time.
So congratulations!! You’ve got lots of people who are 100% thrilled for you.
The test is still laying on the bathroom counter. Every time I pee, I look to make sure the lines are actually still there.
Hugs. Our planned-but-not-planned-QUITE-SO-SOON second pregnancy really threw me for a loop for a few days. Weeks. Months. Up until the day I gave birth I was secretly terrified – and then after that I was VISIBLY terrified. But things are OK, some days even better than OK, and you are going to be fine.
I am visibly and secretly terrified. I’m very deer-in-headlights I think.
Congratulations and I’m thinking of you as you process this!
Thank you, frelle. Processing is difficult.
Congratulations!!! One moment at a time. One moment at a time.
Exactly. One moment at a time.
“Funny, I don’t remember packing that” …cracked me up. =)
Congrats! From one accidental second pregnancy mama to another – you can totally do this. Give yourself permission to process. Holler at me if you need anything!!! ((hugs))
Susan
I will certainly holler. Loudly.
Although we’d been trying for a second child for a few months, I got my positive test the same day my husband was told by his boss that he may no longer be a good fit for their company. He packed up his desk, fully expecting to be fired, and came home horribly upset. He was ecstatic at the news, but all I knew is my safe and comfy stay at home mom world had had two big shocks that day, and I was terrified for weeks as he had meetings with the various levels of management that he would lose his job (and our insurance). In the end, he kept his job, and is guaranteed his job through next September, but it was definitely a rocky start to my pregnancy. And a rocky end now that I’ve been diagnosed with gestational diabetes.
Holy crap! I’d lose my marbles if all of that happened! Sorry to hear about the GD. 🙁
Congrats!!!
Thank you.
Miranda!!! Congratulations, love!!! <3
Thank you, Jenny!
Congrats. It will be great. Better than great.
I hope so.
Miranda!! You’ll be great. Truly. Congratulations.
I hope so. And thanks.
Wow! How absolutely positively exciting! Congratulations!
I’m glad y’all are excited. I need other people to be excited since I’m having trouble getting there.
Congratulations! It’s totally normal to not even know how you feel about it. Give it time to sink in. I’m happy for you! Hope you are feeling well…
I completely don’t know how I feel about this and I’ve been living with it for 2.5 weeks.
Do you know how I know you’re going to be an amazing mom? Because you already are one.
This 2nd baby is going to be one of the two luckiest kids in the world. And you’re pretty lucky yourself, mama. So much love to you.
Thank you, you. Thank you a ton.