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Thank you, Diego

June 25, 2011 by Miranda 22 Comments

This morning I realized something.

I really dislike frogs and do not AT ALL understand what causes people to think they are cute/adorable/awesome/whatever.

Their only purpose on this earth is to eat insects so we’re not constantly swarming with gnats and flies and such. That’s it. Period.

I realized this while watching an episode of Go, Diego, Go where he is tasked with saving two tree frogs who are on a branch, sailing down a river and apparently UNABLE TO JUMP OFF THE DAMN BRANCH AT ANY POINT ON THEIR WILD RIVER ADVENTURE.

I mean, COME ON. Isn’t jumping what frogs are supposed to do?

Stupid red-eyed tree frogs. Stupid.

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And not cute. At all. And anyone who says “Awww, they are so cute” and then goes on to collect statues and tchotchkes of frogs needs to have his or her head examined.

I blame the Grimm brothers or Hans Christian Anderson for the belief that frogs are cute. Like, if we just think they are cute enough we’ll somehow be tricked into kissing them hoping a prince will appear.

(Don’t you think it’s about time we started telling our kids how those “fairy tales” REALLY ended?)

Or maybe it’s the fact that some of them secrete hallucinogens. I think.

Stupid frogs.

And stupid misplaced anger resulting from my TV constantly streaming children’s shows.
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Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: blog fun, children's shows hate me, confessions, general craziness, I might be crazy, mommyhood, somewhat nonsensical

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Comments

  1. Catherine says

    June 25, 2011 at 2:26 pm

    I’m really not trying to be rude, but don’t you think your son watches a lot of tv? It seems every post you write about him references television. I know you live in the Atlanta area, and it is hot, but does he ever really play outside?

    My daughter is the same age, and I let her watch 1 hour of tv in the morning then I turn it off the rest of the day. I know you have said you enjoy tv too, and maybe it isn’t as much as it sounds when you blog.

    I totally realize I’m sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong, but I just couldn’t help but say something.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      June 25, 2011 at 4:41 pm

      Hi, Catherine. Thanks for commenting.

      What you have to remember about blogging is that I’m writing about isolated incidents and not daily, hour-by-hour occurrences. So, it could SEEM like I’m talking about tv all the time when I COULD be talking about the 1 hour a day he is allowed to watch. And then it’s going to SEEM like he watches too much television. But yes, the tv is a frequent flyer in our house.

      Most of the time, the tv is just ON. It probably started when he was an infant and I was home with him and in the throes of PPD. I couldn’t NOT have background noise during the day. I couldn’t NOT have the sounds of other people talking since there was no one I could talk to (aside from him, which I did, but mostly in the “Please, please, please stop crying” kind of way.) TV helped me make it until my husband got home and I think Joshua just got used to it. I prefer children’s programming for during the day because at least I know he’s not going to see guns and violence and sex there. So, Diego and Yo Gabba Gabba it is.

      But he doesn’t actually WATCH television for hours on end. He’ll ask for a Thomas or a Diego and watch for about 5 or 10 minutes. That’s his max on sitting still. Most of the time, he’s playing trains or pretending to sip tea from a candle-stick holder or building towers with his blocks or reading books or asking me to make up stories for him.

      And yes, I do live in Atlanta, and no, we don’t get outside as much as we could or should. And that’s totally my fault.

      Reply
    • Dan says

      June 25, 2011 at 4:43 pm

      The TV’s off right now, just sayin’.

      Reply
      • Miranda says

        June 25, 2011 at 4:44 pm

        I love you, babe.

        Reply
  2. MamaRobinJ says

    June 25, 2011 at 4:02 pm

    Oh lord… I’m going to leave a supportive comment.

    I know. Some of those shows make me want to scratch my eyes out. But you know what? If it makes your day easier then fine. When it starts to feel like it’s too much and I want him to do something else I turn it off. But if it keeps me sane? So be it.

    Also, I like frogs. Not real ones, but I think frog stuff is kind of funky. Real ones are slimy. My grandma was absolutely terrified of frogs though.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      June 25, 2011 at 4:43 pm

      ๐Ÿ™‚

      That’s what I do, too. He likes the chatter. I like the chatter. He is totally my child in that regard.

      Blech. I’d rather have a real frog around me than fake frog stuff. But even those are gross and kind of make me all gross feeling. Ew.

      Reply
  3. Suz says

    June 25, 2011 at 6:31 pm

    Not a frog fan. But my love of all things owl in our house might freak out some.
    Our TV is on from the moment we come home until we go to sleep. No judgement from here. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      June 25, 2011 at 8:22 pm

      But owls are smart and cute! They are not icky like frogs!

      And yeah, the TV is almost always on here. Except right now, oddly enough. But we’re about to start a Weeds mini-marathon, so it’ll be on any minute now.

      Reply
  4. Alison@Mama Wants This says

    June 25, 2011 at 6:56 pm

    My household is the same – we have the TV on most of the morning as background noise. Once in a while, he will watch whatever’s on (usually Elmo) for a few minutes, and run off to do something. It’s not possible for toddlers to be couch potatoes, they don’t stay still long enough!

    Whatever it takes to get everyone through the day, yo.

    And frogs, urgh.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      June 25, 2011 at 8:24 pm

      That’s what it is here. We’ll turn it on, he’ll watch for 5 minutes, run off to play with his toys for half an hour, watch for 5 more minutes, etc. Like you said, he doesn’t sit still long enough to be a couch potato.

      And I feel you on the “urgh.”

      Reply
  5. Tawny says

    June 25, 2011 at 8:32 pm

    My son went on a Go Diego Go marathon one weekend and watched almost the entire series on Netflix in a row. Gah! My husband and I were singing the theme song for weeks. And yeah… frogs are totally gross. I especially hate the sound of the croaking. And even the word “croak” sounds nasty.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      June 25, 2011 at 8:36 pm

      I didn’t even think about how awful sounding the word croak is. But yes, awful. And gross. Now I never want to hear another frog in my life.

      Reply
  6. Margaret (@goodbadfamily) says

    June 25, 2011 at 9:30 pm

    My gripe with Diego & Dora, for that matter, is that they do nothing but scream at each other. Have you ever noticed? They don’t talk. They yell. Probably because they’re attempting to talk to animals like frogs and aren’t getting a response. Anyhoo, I feel like Diego & Dora are responsible for 50% of the screaming my kids do. They are now banned. It’s all Winnie the Pooh from here on. Those cats are so mellow. Me likey.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      June 25, 2011 at 10:55 pm

      Oh, Dora. That bossy little preschooler always telling us what to say. Winnie the Pooh sounds great. Nice and calm and soothing. Until Tigger comes bouncing in and screwing things up.

      Reply
    • Teresa says

      June 26, 2011 at 9:34 am

      I totally agree. My son’s voice is always on yelling volume. I blame Diego and Dora too. LOL to your comment about them “attempting to talk to animals”. Dora is like “do YOU want TO HELP us FIND Boot’s TOY?!” So frickin’ annoying. My 4 yr old finds those shows boring now,but my 2 yr old LOVES Dora and Diego. Shoot me.

      and Miranda- I HATE frogs. I pretend to be brave when I see one, for my son, but they freak me out. I just got chills thinking about it. And the tree frogs around here are so LOUD! Ugh!!!!

      Reply
      • Miranda says

        June 26, 2011 at 11:01 am

        Heh. They are some loud little cartoons, aren’t they.

        Reply
  7. molly says

    June 25, 2011 at 10:14 pm

    Oh Miranda. We were getting along so well!

    I super duper love frogs. In fact, Brigham’s nickname was Briggy Froglegs from the time he was born because they looked like the cute (yes, cute, I said it) skinny legs on a frog.

    I have a whole poem I wrote about a pet frog I had when I was little. His name was Georgie. I still want to publish a children’s book based on him. I took him to show and tell and everything.

    Also? The boys’ bathroom is completely a frog theme ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      June 25, 2011 at 10:56 pm

      Oh goodness.

      I still love you. And I’d still buy your book for Joshua if you wrote it.

      But oh goodness.

      Reply
  8. Suzanne says

    June 25, 2011 at 10:40 pm

    If you don’t like frogs, don’t look at my iPhone pic post this week. GIANT FROG RIGHT IN YOUR FACE GAAAAH.

    We’re a tv family too. I can’t stand the silence in the house – makes me feel like my head is being crushed by quietness – so as soon as we’re awake it’s on. I am TERRIBLE at remembering my 2 year old is at the point of actually watching shows these days and he often wanders in and sits down to watch America’s Next Top Model repeats or something equally inappropriate. We’ve recently started watching Thomas (MOAR TRAIN? MOAR TRAIN?) but even though he loves it he only last for 3 minutes before wandering away.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      June 25, 2011 at 10:59 pm

      Noted. I shall skip that one when it pops up in the reader.

      And Thomas? That’s a super special club. Joshua loves Thomas. Loves. 90% of what we have playing all day here is Thomas streaming on Netflix. The child wakes up asking for “chocka per-y.” (That’s “chocolate Percy” for anyone not speaking toddler.”)

      Thomas is never far away from Joshua.

      Reply
  9. Kimberly says

    June 26, 2011 at 9:21 am

    Well I was about to say something then got thrown off by the first comment. I love you and you’re a great mom. Don’t forget that.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      June 26, 2011 at 11:02 am

      I love you, too, Kim.

      Reply

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