It feels almost ridiculous at this point to open up WordPress and be like “I am for real going to start writing again!” I think this might be the 7th or 8th time I’ve done this in as many years. But I’m here, in this dashboard, writing, because I said I would and told other people I would and maybe—just maybe—this will be the time that this commitment I seem to repeatedly make to myself sticks.
Or it won’t and I’ll spiral into shame and self-loathing for a while until I find another hobby to start and stop and then berate myself about that one instead. Could go either way, TBH.
But I went to Mom 2.0 last weekend for the 11th time in a row and, I don’t know, things just feel a little different this time. Like it’s time for me to figure out my shit, who I am, what I want to be. You know, good old fashioned Elder-Millennial-who-has-lived-through-multiple-once-in-a-lifetime-events existentialism.
(My kids are getting older, which means I am getting older, and I’m battling some deep, deep internal demons about who I am when I’m not actively momming them anymore. Plus we’re in a real-life dystopia and those are never good for a person’s sense of identity.)
But in the spirit of catching up, the last year—well, the last two years—were not good for me, friends. A midlife ADHD diagnosis and learning more about myself in a few months than I had known in my entire life up until that point and discovering my new normal led to months of suck which led to burnout which ended in a layoff (followed by a completely WTF election) and in the midst of it all being a wife and mom and woman and friend and trying not to let anyone down, least of all myself.
And I’ve never really talked about any of that here, so now seems like as good a time as any. You’re welcome, I think.
When SEO took over, blogging started to suck. Can we make the internet fun again? Please?
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I want to use this space to talk about life with that old school, early 2000s-style journal blogging. Run on sentences and free-flowing thoughts. Using this space to pour myself out a little bit, knowing that maybe people will read it, but probably people won’t.
But maybe those who do read it will be like “oh yeah, that’s me too.”
I still believe there’s beauty and magic in that, even after all this time. Especially after all this time.
So that’s what I’m going to do. Commit myself to writing again. Sometimes for me, but sometimes also for you. And maybe along the way we’ll figure some shit out.
Sound good?
What’s life been like for you lately?
What a surprise to see this pop up on my feed reader this week! With the state of social media these days, I’m all for heading back to blogs!
Yes! A comment! This is what I was hoping for! 😃
I love social media, but it’s controlled by whatever algorithm can make rich people richer and I just miss having a connection and community. (I also started a Substack for my hot takes and more chaotic ramblings. I’ll use this spot for the long-form stuff that needs SEO.)