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Breaking the rules–blogging about blogging

August 28, 2012 by Miranda 51 Comments

Please allow me to be a rebel and break some rules, y’all. I need to blog about blogging. Specifically this blog. Because writing commentary about anyone else’s would be in bad taste.

Basically, I need to say that this is hard.

Sometimes, really hard.

Before going to BlogHer last year, I thought I was on the verge of something big. Huge. I didn’t know what that something was, but I felt it. I knew that greatness was out there, waiting for me. I was incredibly hopeful for the “next step.” Whatever that next step was supposed to be.

And then I found out I was Surprise Pregnant and got all locked up inside my own mind for a time and weeks would go by before I’d open the dashboard and sit down to clickety-clack on my keyboard and talk to y’all. All of my hope was…gone? Dormant? Buried under a metric ton of FREAKING THE FREAK OUT.

This year, I went to BlogHer with virtually no expectations for my blog. I really went to see my people and New York City and if I learned a thing or two, cool. And now I’ve been home for almost a month and what I realized I learned is that I want to take this seriously. And I want to be taken seriously.

The trouble is I don’t know how and I’m finding out that there’s a whole lot I don’t know about this blogging thing that I thought I knew. But beyond that, I want this place to grow and I don’t know how to make that happen.

I want people to read what I have to write here on this blog of mine.

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It feels…wrong…somehow to admit that, but I have a desire to have people read my words. But I do.

But I don’t want people–my community–y’all–to think I’ve somehow sold myself out to grow in this space. But I feel like I need to grow. I need to challenge myself to be better. To see what I can be.

I want to tell stories here. I want to get up on my soap box here. I want to use my voice for good here.

I want to share my life here.

And the word “share” means that there are two (or more) parties involved. If I’m sharing, someone’s receiving, right?

Here I am. Where are you?

I want to grow this blog without losing my readers. Is that even possible?

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Previous Post: « Nom Nom Baby Toes
Next Post: A blog about blogging: Part Two »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Tracy @ The UnCoordinated Mommy says

    August 28, 2012 at 11:41 pm

    I totally get you and I support you. I’m in the same boat, just further down stream. Or is it up? Who knows… Basically I’m about to have my surprise baby and just recently started taking my blog seriously. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 3:55 pm

      YAY SURPRISE BABIES!

      Or…you know…whatever.

      Reply
  2. Sierra says

    August 28, 2012 at 11:48 pm

    I hope it’s possible, for your sake and mine! ๐Ÿ™‚

    I’ve been blogging on and off for 3 years now and I feel like I’m going through the same range of emotions…minus the surprise baby. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 3:57 pm

      I think I’ve been blogging since 2008 and the growth has been steady-ish. But right now it’s stagnant and I don’t know what to do to churn the waters.

      Reply
      • Sierra says

        August 29, 2012 at 4:37 pm

        I haven’t been an active blogger for long enough to know exactly what to do, but I do work in digital marketing so if you’d ever like to chat I’m all ears!

        Reply
        • Miranda says

          August 30, 2012 at 11:20 am

          I might just take you up on that ๐Ÿ™‚

          Reply
  3. Isha says

    August 29, 2012 at 12:03 am

    I understand completely. I have like no followers, but really wish I did. So grow grow grow away!

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:36 pm

      I’m trying. It’s hard.

      Reply
  4. Rebecca says

    August 29, 2012 at 12:03 am

    Oh. Em. Gee. I was nodding my head through this whole post. I feel the same way but feel light years behind where you are. Seems like even with the surprise pregnancy you’ve maintained a great blog with really clever writing and you’ve stayed active in social media despite all your transitions.

    I don’t know the first thing about growing your readership because I’d be doing it all if I did ๐Ÿ™‚ But I don’t think you’ll lose readers because you are a really great writer who can be genuine and hilarious all in the same breath.

    Best of luck growing and imma bet we’ll all keep coming back for more as you grow ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:37 pm

      I think social media has been my saving grace, really. And I don’t really know how to grow my readers other than to keep writing. So, I guess that’s what I do.

      Reply
  5. katery says

    August 29, 2012 at 12:16 am

    first of all, it’s not wrong to admit that you want people to read what you have to write on your blog. i mean, isn’t that why we have blogs? so that people will read them? obviously there’s other reasons for blogging, like getting your thoughts sorted out and most importantly, finding this wonderful supportive community, but, i mean, we kind of write them with the expectation that people are going to read, right? and there are different kinds of blogs. some people, like me, don’t post regularly enough or write interestingly enough to have a huge following, but we do have our few important regulars who are always there for us, no matter how bad things get. and then there are other people who post, if not every day, NEARLY every day, and are GOOD writers, who can make even the most boring and mundane stories interesting, funny or touching in some way that a lot of people really connect to, and i think that’s you. neither type is wrong or right, they are both important, to us and to the people who follow us and because it allows us to connect with people who understand us and know exactly what we are talking about, or, even if they don’t, they are still there to encourage and support you. i think growing your blog in any way possible and any way you see fit is a great idea, i mean, it is YOUR blog. it’s your space to be whoever you want to be, say whatever you want to say and most importantly, CONNECT with people. i don’t know why in the world growing your blog would make you lose readers, if people enjoy what you write why would they care if you had 10 followers or 10,000 followers? it makes no difference to me. all i know is that i enjoy reading your blog, and as long as i enjoy reading it, i’m going to read it. you will most definitely not lose me as a reader.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:38 pm

      I think in the beginning, I really, really did just write for myself. But that was in 2008. It was like “I’m going to throw this out here. Maybe people will read it. Maybe they won’t. Here it is anyway.” And now I find that, yeah, I DO want people reading because, damn it, I pour my heart into this.

      Thank you for reading.

      Reply
  6. Sally says

    August 29, 2012 at 8:58 am

    You are doing a great job. How to increase your readers, I don’t know as I don’t blog. I will say that you are bookmarked in my favorites and I do check your blog almost every day. Just don’t stop! Love your honesty and your writing. Just saying, I’m a blog stalker! Hahaha!
    (you have pretty babies too)

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:42 pm

      Thank you for reading. And for the comment about my babies. That’s why I don’t sell them to the circus!

      Reply
  7. Rosstwinmom says

    August 29, 2012 at 9:09 am

    There is a difference between gaining a larger audience and becoming solely commercial, or selling out. Trying to get your words read is a good goal. It’s my goal this year too. I want people to read and understand my words. I love interacting with readers based on my words.

    You can grow the blog and stick to your voice and original intent, even with money-making efforts on your part. Selling out to me implies content being driven by what sponsors or goodies you can get instead of content driven by your inspiration.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:43 pm

      There IS a difference, yes, but sometimes it seems like becoming more commercial comes with a larger audience and vice versa. I don’t ever want to be driven by money, but having this be a self-sustaining thing wouldn’t be so bad either.

      Reply
  8. Jessica says

    August 29, 2012 at 9:10 am

    You know I’m always going to read you. I may not always comment, but you’re in my favorites and I check in on you every day (stalker much?) Keep writing, we’ll be here.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:44 pm

      Thank you for always checking in on me. ๐Ÿ™‚

      It’s nice to know y’all are out there.

      Reply
      • Jessica says

        August 29, 2012 at 4:49 pm

        Ok…not stalking.

        Just watching.

        Always.

        <3

        Reply
        • Miranda says

          August 30, 2012 at 7:25 am

          I totally see you outside my windows. I will leave you a sandwich and a soda.

          Reply
          • Jessica says

            August 30, 2012 at 8:07 am

            I prefer wine and cookies, but whatevs.

  9. Nicci @ Changing the Universe says

    August 29, 2012 at 9:26 am

    Do it!! Grow this bad boy ๐Ÿ™‚

    And you know I’m not going anywhere when you do! I’m a creepy stalker like that ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:45 pm

      I’m trying! And thanks for being a (non) creepy stalker!

      Reply
  10. molly says

    August 29, 2012 at 9:31 am

    It’s okay to want people to read. I think deep down we all want the same thing for our blogs. We want our voices to be heard. I love it when I get comments. It makes me feel like my time was not wasted and that people truly care about my words.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:46 pm

      Yes! The comments are the lifeblood! They drive me to come back day after day. It feels like I’m not supposed to admit that, but there it is. I want to know people are out there, you know?

      Reply
  11. April says

    August 29, 2012 at 9:54 am

    I’m basically echoing every other person before me when I say: you are an excellent writer, you really are destined to be big, and we all feel the same way! I’m also light years behind you as a blogger, and I have absolutely no idea how to grow. This has been something I’ve been struggling with this week and I haven’t known how to approach it. I have tried joining some facebook blogging groups and it seems like there are a lot of people gaining a lot of followers — but there’s so very little to read. I don’t know their hearts at all, I just know what they pin on pinterest or their latest giveaway.

    My friend said something to me this week in encouragement: “Do you want to gain followers or readers? You may take longer to grow, but you want to find people who will read you, not simply follow.” That is the beat of my heart. I write to connect. I want people to feel my heartbeat, to know how much I genuinely care.

    You are an excellent writer. You’re funny and you talk to people on Twitter and your blog — that’s what made me continue to follow you. Why? Because I want to make connections – not become part of a herd. Keep writing. I believe you have everything it takes.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:48 pm

      I like the followers vs. readers bit. A lot. I want an engaged and interactive community. I want people to know my heart. The good parts and the bad parts.

      Interaction is like crack to me.

      Reply
  12. Beth Anne says

    August 29, 2012 at 10:22 am

    I think we all feel that way.

    Like…we want more. So we push for more. Then we wonder if we’re doing it right. We wonder if we’re losing friends, if we’re “selling out,” or if we’re doing what we’re called to do. We wonder how to reign it back in after we reach out (because that’s the aftermath). Then you wonder if you’ve lost your voice, your touch, if you’re irrelevant. You wonder why you’re not invited to certain opportunities while your friends wonder why you are invited to certain opportunities & they’re not & it’s all this huge game of comparison where nobody wins.

    Then you blow it all up, start a new blog, & get back to your roots (what I’m doing this coming month, shhhh.)

    Blogging is a beast. A wonderful, scary beast full of self-doubt & wanting more & never knowing exactly how to do it.

    So yeah. I’m with you.

    Reply
    • Sierra says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:35 pm

      I hate that trying to grow a blog, pushing for more, and trying to reach more readers is considering “selling out”. That stinks.

      Also, what’s this about a new blog?!? Wheee!

      Reply
      • Miranda says

        August 29, 2012 at 4:54 pm

        I hate the growth=selling out too. HATE it.

        Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:52 pm

      Yes, if I push for more, I don’t want to be considered a “sell out.” But if we’re not happy with where we are and we never push for more, then why the hell are we doing any of it?

      And I hate the comparison that comes along with it, both the kind others do and the kind we do ourselves. Hate it. And yet, I do it. We all do it.

      Reply
      • Sierra says

        August 29, 2012 at 5:31 pm

        You know what, haters gonna hate. Don’t let them stop you from making your blog great(er)!

        Also, FWIW, I don’t mind when bloggers write product reviews, sponsored posts, giveaways or have a million ads on their site. I look for a story I connect with, period.

        Reply
  13. Sarah says

    August 29, 2012 at 11:21 am

    If there was a way to +1 what Beth Anne said, I would. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:56 pm

      Consider it +1’d!

      Reply
  14. Melissa Ryan says

    August 29, 2012 at 12:26 pm

    I completely agree. Sometimes I type my posts and wonder if anyone actually reads my stuff. But I get comments so I know they do, but do they think it is good writing. Does it actually inspire them or teach them or make them laugh or cry? Blogging is hard hard work.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:57 pm

      Blogging IS hard work.

      Reply
  15. Carrie says

    August 29, 2012 at 1:09 pm

    I hope it’s possible! I’m in the same boat…only leaps and bounds behind you as far as readership goes (at least I imagine…I get a little excited still when I get a single comment, LOL!). You’re one of the “Big Name” bloggers, in my opinion. ๐Ÿ™‚

    I’ll be along for the ride and wish you tons of luck!

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:58 pm

      I’m a minnow in a big, big pond! ๐Ÿ™‚

      And thanks for coming along for the ride.

      Reply
  16. Lenette says

    August 29, 2012 at 1:55 pm

    I’m here and reading Miranda!

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 4:58 pm

      Thank you for being here and reading ๐Ÿ™‚

      Reply
  17. Erin G @ebum1101 says

    August 29, 2012 at 3:06 pm

    Oh I totally hope it’s possible! I want more people to read what you write too. You have a voice and a good one. It’s so hard to find the right balance between writing good content and getting it in the screens of people who you think would like it… and not being all sponsory and annoying. I think MODG does really well at writing for sponsors without letting them affect her true content. As does Cecily K. They’re rare, but they prove that it can be done. Good luck good luck, and know that we’re still reading and supporting!!

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 5:00 pm

      Ding ding ding! You hit it! It IS hard to write good stuff AND get people to read it WITHOUT being annoying about it.

      I think when you’re talking about someone like MODG, she had the numbers LONG before she had the sponsors, you know? So now she has the leverage to say “this is what I do. like it or don’t.” And then she can run with it. I’m not sure I have that yet.

      Reply
  18. Delfin Joaquin Paris III says

    August 29, 2012 at 3:09 pm

    I used to fret about readership – total waste of time.

    The problem isn’t will my readers stay. Either they will or won’t. You have NO control over that (pageviews, comments, etc).

    Now, if you need more readers it’s very simple. Get in front of more eyeballs. Your tribe will find you. My traffic exploded after I realized I just needed to get in front of more people who like funny memoir-style stories.

    And clearly with 16 comments thus far on this post, you’re doing GREAT. So ease up on yourself! This is a marathon, NOT a sprint.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 29, 2012 at 5:02 pm

      True, true. You make good points. I can’t will people to read and get them to stay here. But it’s the getting in front of more eyeballs that I’m struggling with, I think. Short of being all “HELLO WORLD! LOOK AT ME” I’m just not sure how to go about getting the views. And that’s where I’m stumped.

      But yes, marathon. Not sprint. However, I’m no runner so the metaphor is more like “7 course meal, not hot dog eating competition.”

      Reply
      • Delfin Joaquin Paris III says

        August 29, 2012 at 7:15 pm

        Contact me offline – I have a sneaky, yet totally ethical way to do this. ๐Ÿ™‚

        Reply
  19. Lenore says

    August 29, 2012 at 9:50 pm

    Honestly, I’ve assumed since I started reading/following you that you were already doing fantastically in the blogging world. I am in a similar position, although on a larger (smaller?) scale because I am seriously behind you. This is the third time I’ve started my blog over again because I just haven’t known what I wanted to write about. Now, I’ve decided to quit trying to pigeonhole myself and just….write what I want to write about. In exchange, though, I do want readers, as you do. And you are right, the comments are like crack…I just keep wanting more, and they motivate me to continue posting.

    But enough about me. You write with an actual voice, and I think that is so, so important in the blogging world. Your personality comes out in your words, and it can be seen even after reading just one or two posts, which has to have huge value in drawing people in.

    As far as selling out goes….if you have the readers already, they’ll stick with you as long as you keep writing about what you love, even if some of those posts are about sponsors. I feel like you’re only selling out when you start blogging for anyone that’ll sponsor you or trying to use your blog solely to get free stuff. That isn’t to say that making a living from your blog isn’t awesome, though…I’m insanely jealous of those that do that!

    I’m rambling now. The end!

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 30, 2012 at 10:00 am

      I don’t think I’m doing terribly, but I always wonder if I could be doing better, you know?

      I’m glad people can hear my voice and know my words are my words. That’s actually quite reassuring. I want to sound like Miranda and not like Miranda-trying-to-sound-like-someone-else.

      Reply
  20. Jenn says

    August 30, 2012 at 12:03 am

    It’s a fine line, for sure. I quit blogging a loooong time ago, but I can speak as a blog reader. I am the reason it’s such a fine line. I enjoy a blog with lots of content, quality content. I love reading along as blogs grow and my favorite voices are gaining more of a following…and then there always seems to be that point.
    The point that I feel like it’s pointless to comment, because my thoughts would just get lost, the point when I feel like posts start to be more and more about giveaways (and I love a good giveaway, but not ALL the time!) and promoting products instead of about writing, entertaining, and informing. Eventually, as a reader, I start to feel like nobody would notice if I stopped reading. There’s no point to entering any contests at that point, either, because millions of people are competing. Once blogs don’t feel “homey” to me anymore, I stop reading them. There is most definitely such a thing as TOO big. The goal should not be to grow things in any way possible. The goal should be to grow the right way. Very, very fine line.

    Reply
    • Miranda says

      August 30, 2012 at 10:04 am

      That’s the thing. I always want to provide relevant, real content. But I don’t want to get to THAT point. I don’t want my readers to feel that they don’t matter. Because they DO matter.

      But that “right way to grow” thing is hard.

      Reply
  21. Kristi says

    August 30, 2012 at 2:53 pm

    Here is my take… I read a lot more blogs. Meaning, I blog too but most the people I read don’t even know I have a blog or take the time to comment. I don’t post all the time. And I don’t read very many blogs when the author posts every day. I just get tired of reading and find them repeating things and posting about things people have already discussed. The people I read the most, the ones I crave to read, are relevant, inspiring, real and most days leave me smiling, crying or laughing at my screen. I think the balance is hard…How do you grow your blog but stay true to who you are as a writer without fear of people not liking what they read?
    For me, time is the deciding factor…so I write when I can and I hope to be better.
    But for you, I say go for it. Challenge yourself to be great and see who comes along for the ride!

    Reply

Trackbacks

  1. A blog about blogging, part two says:
    August 30, 2012 at 3:31 pm

    […] Miranda on August 30, 2012 I blogged about blogging and y’all didn’t run away! […]

    Reply

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