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I’m supposed to talk about resolutions or something, right?

I’ve never kept a single resolution I’ve ever made. (And luckily, I know I’m not alone.)

I make the resolutions to lose weight or to eat healthier or to exercise and then I fail. Because that’s what I do.  But that’s what a lot of people do.  I make resolutions to keep my house cleaner or more organized. To keep up with my grading.  To watch less TV or to drink less wine or coffee. Or to be a better wife. And I fail.  Hard.

So what am I going to do?  Why, make more resolutions, of course!  Because in addition to failing, that’s what I do.  And some of these will be the same ol’, same ol’ I’ve said in the past.  Only this time, for some of them, I have plans in place to help me achieve these goals through at least the first quarter of the year.  I mean, that’s only three months.  I can do this for three months, right?

(I should probably start with three WEEKS instead of months, but I got a little extra sleep last night and I’m feeling ambitious.)

Here are my resolutions and strategies. If you have any tips, you can always leave them in the comments section. I don’t mind.  (That was a solicitation for advice. How many times will you ever get one of those in your life?)

1. I will be healthier this year.   I am good at sticking to a plan long enough to see some small results. And then a holiday rolls around where there are delicious foods or life gets crazy or I get hormonal and I eat. A lot. I do not control my portions. And I’m lazy. 

So what’s my strategy to make this year different? Dan bought me a Groupon to a local gym.  (We tried to justify this as a Christmas present but gym memberships fall under the umbrella of “Things You Never Buy Your Wife If You Ever Want To Get Laid Again” along with vacuum cleaners and washing machines.)

The membership includes personal training visits, a nutritional plan, eight weeks of membership and some other stuff (free water? that’s a perk, right?). And it’s less than 5 minutes from the school. Which means I can go right after work and Joshua can stay at daycare and then I can go pick him up when I leave the gym. 

How will this keep me accountable?  Because I’ve never worked with a personal trainer before.  I’ve never had someone “show me the ropes” of a gym and help me feel comfortable in one.  So the fact that I’ll have an appointment to keep will force me to get myself into the gym at least twice a week for 30 minutes at a time as long as the personal trainer isn’t some treadmill-nazi who handcuffs me to the machine and hangs a Snickers in front of my face. Because that does not sound comforting at all.  And that’s a start, right? 

I suspect that after going regularly, I’ll develop a habit.  I’m not sure how attached I’ll be to this habit, but the bonus is that this gym’s monthly fee is really reasonable ($30/month) should I decide I want to keep going after my trial membership period is over. I’m thinking I’ll schedule my first visits to start this week.  Of course I’ll let you know how it goes. That’s what McFatty Monday is all about.

2.  I will keep my house cleaner this year.  A while ago (like, a four years?) Dan and I kicked around the idea of vacuuming every day. That lasted for one day. And then Dan said we needed a “His and Hers” chore chart. I balked because that made us seem like roommates, even though that would’ve meant I maybe could’ve used star stickers or something. And then we said something about making a “Daily, Weekly, Monthly” list of chores. And then we never did it.  Because, I mean, why would we?  It was a resolution we didn’t keep.  A fleeting conversation that we both immediately pretended to forget.  Until we realized that we like the way our house feels when it’s clean and tidy and company ready. (FYI: Parts of this house will never be company ready. If you come over and a door is shut, do not open the door for fear of your life.)

My plan? I’m making one of these to hang in our kitchen. And I’m going to do that whole “Daily, Weekly, Monthly” list thing.  It seems to be the least insane way for me to keep up with what needs to be done around here.  I’m taking this tip from The Fly Lady for my daily things. (And only this tip. For now. Because The Fly Lady scares the ish out of me.)

If I do my weekly things on Saturday morning or Thursday evening or whenever, it doesn’t matter.  They’re being done weekly.  Monthly things will be done, uh…monthly. Probably on like the last Saturday of the month. But I have to figure out what exactly constitutes a monthly chore first.  And then I’ll go from there. 

How will that little board keep me accountable? Check-marking them off is instant gratification! Eventually, this, too, will become a habit. And when I can have an impromptu play date with our friends and my house is go-time ready? I’ll feel a sense of accomplishment, right?  I hope so.

Here’s the big plan for 2011.

3.  I want to wean off of my meds. I’ve been feeling pretty great lately, even on my bad days.  When the bad days crop up, I’m able to look back at them and see them as days that are “normal bad days” instead of days that are “PPD/A bad days.”  To those of you who’ve never dealt with PPD/A, that might not make much sense.  But to me, and to women like me, it makes sense.  Because the bad days of PPD/A are not the same as normal bad days.  And I don’t exactly know how to explain the difference other than to say that they’re just different.  

I’m not starting this one immediately.  But my goal by the end of 2011 is to be off of my Celexa.  My therapeutic dose is not high, but you should never wean from a medication like anti-depressants or anti-anxieties too quickly. Nor should you try to go cold turkey.

While I have many reasons for wanting to come off the medication, the main one is that I believe in my soul that I’m ready to stop, and I know that I won’t ever know that for sure if I don’t try to trust myself and do it. 

That’s actually the crux of all three of these resolutions, really.  Trusting myself to stick with them.

What are your resolutions?

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