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I’m so tired!!


So this Prometrium might be messing with me. I should be nearing ovulation, but the ovulation predictor kits (OPK) I’ve taken have both been negative. My secondary signs are good but my temps are all sorts of weird. Looks like I’m going to NOT ovulate AND have a fourth period in a six week time frame. Bummer.

I was talking to mom this morning and she randomly asked me about Clomid. It seems my mom (who knows we are TTC) (Hi Mom!) has been doing her own research about PCOS. Awww! My Aunt B (Memaw) used Clomid to get pregnant with her daughter S back in the 1970s. She has PCOS too. (My Memaw, not her daughter…although her daughter might have it as well.) So many things about my family are making sense now that I know what’s going on with my body. I know one of my cousins underwent some sort of injectables in order to conceive her daughter in the early 90s, and if I’m not mistaken, my cousin S had some trouble getting pregnant, too.

I don’t want to assume that just because they had to go the medicated routes in order to get pregnant that I will too, but I think there’s something hereditary here. When I think about the women in my family, we are all very similar to one another externally. Looks like we share a genetic predisposition to trashed reproductive organs as well. Awesome! Woohoo!

I don’t mean to be making ligh…wait a minute, I totally do! Sarcasm is my friend!

I’m feeling kind of bummed out today, for whatever reason. I know that there are women in this world who are fighting much harder battle with infertility than I am, but geez, THIS SUCKS. I don’t think I should have to feel bad about complaining about this, but somehow I do. I don’t even know if I can justifiably call what I’m dealing with infertility since I haven’t been TTC for long, and that in and of itself is a reason that I’m irritated. Is this infertility? Am I infertile? I feel like I’m in limbo between maybe this won’t be a big deal and it totally is. I should be thankful for the good things in my life, like my supportive husband and my wonderful mother, but I just can’t help feeling broken.

To top it all off, I think I’m coming down with a spring/early summer cold. Or, the pollen around here has finally decided to kick my ass. The tonsils are swollen and the nose is stuffy. BOO!

God, I’m whiny today…

Random observation over the past three days: Trader Joe’s Everything Pretzel Slims, when eaten with nothing to drink, give me the hiccups.

I believe that uncertainty is really my spirit’s way of whispering, “I’m in flux. I can’t decide for you. Something is off-balance here.”–Oprah
In these matters the only certainty is that nothing is certain.
–Pliny the Elder

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Tuesday 6th of May 2008

Miranda,IMHO, it's better to get it outthan it is to be "stoical" forthe sake of not offending anyone.If you hold your frustration in,

you run the risk of letting itreally get to you.

I know of nobody, including yours truly, who doesn't get things off their chest when it's as important as this issue.

I just stopped corresponding with a lady who was negative about everything. In the process of tryingto encourage her, I got depressed.

Now that is extreme, but I don't think being concerned about your fertility problem is anything to worry about.

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