Welcome back to State of the Weight Wednesday! This week we’re adding a link-up to the bottom so if you’re following along on your own and want to add a link to your post, please do so that we can all offer support. We’re all in this together. Whatever this is for you.
This week I’m…whatever…to report absolutely no changes at all. Not in the number on the scale and not in measurements that I took last week and this week to compare.
To be honest, it’s kind of discouraging. And this has been the hardest week so far so I’m kind of struggling mentally with where I am and how the week went and seeing no change.
I started tracking my food, water, and exercise on the MyPlate app last Wednesday. I actually didn’t find that to be the hard part at all. Tracking, that is. It was pretty easy to just go in at each meal and find out how much I was putting into my body in order to know where I was for the day. It was also revealing.
I’ve got to do something about my coffee but I’m not ready to switch to drinking it black nor am I a fan of artificial sweeteners. Agave has more calories than sugar and I’m not sure about the flavor of honey in coffee. I don’t know what the answer is.
I didn’t stick to the daily recommended intake allowance on Saturday and Sunday since it was Mother’s Day, but I didn’t blow everything out of the water either. And if you subscribe to the notion that the entire week’s intake is more important than a single day, which I do, I really did a great job for my first week of tracking and being responsible about what I ate and I’m proud of that.
I measured portions with a scale or scoop when I was unsure instead of just eyeballing. I planned healthy meals with lean meats and lots of veggies. I ate more fruits instead of crackers or pretzels. Small changes that make differences.
Through the Livestrong community, I also discovered that I might be overestimating my activity level, so I changed that in my profile yesterday morning and lost some daily calories. That made me grumpy.
Dieting is making me grumpy. Sluggish. Short-fused. I don’t like it. I know that part of this is the adjustment process. That my body has to find its new “normal.” But guys, this? This is hard.
I’m not giving up even though I really want to drown my sorrows in a bowl of ice cream with a side of Pinot right now, but this is hard.
Exercise continues to plague me because I can’t be as consistent as I’d like to be. Inevitably, one of the kids has an issue and I’m called away. Last Wednesday Joshua got physical with another kid and I had to “escort him out” after only 12 minutes. Saturday was short because I didn’t know what time childcare closed and we walked in at 5:15 when they close at 6:00. Monday Emma pooped after 30 minutes. It’s always something.
The number of calories I’m burning each time I exercise is all over the place depending on what I consult. The machine says one thing and the app says another. The truth is probably somewhere in the middle, but I have no idea how to actually measure that and don’t know if I should even worry about it. I mean, is it important that I know how “productive” my workouts are?
I know I have to add weights into my routine. It’s just daunting to think about. Probably as daunting as anything I’ve done so far. Cardio on the elliptical is safe. I can zone out while watching Claire have a baby and Boone die after Jack gives him a blood transfusion with a sea urchin (RIP, BOONE!) and before I know it, 45 minutes is gone.
I can’t do that with the weights. I have to pay attention to what I’m doing but what it feels like is that everyone else is paying attention to me. I know that’s irrational and that no one is likely to even notice the fact that I’m there, but there’s something about that side of the gym that feels like a spotlight is shining on me going “LOOK! LOOK AT THIS GIRL WHO HAS NO IDEA WHAT SHE’S DOING! LOOK AT HER MUFFIN TOP AND FLABBY ARMS!”
Gah. Sorry to sound so discouraging right now. I know that I’m doing something good for us so that keeps me going but there are just some weeks on this journey that are going to be harder than others. And since this is about being real, I guess I’m okay with that. I hope you are too.
Weekly Goal: Continue to track food and plan healthy, filling meals and snacks so I’m not so freaking grumpy
Weight Goal: 10 pounds total. A pesky .5 pound to go.
Remember we’ve got a link-up now, so, uh, link up. (Share the badge if you want! It’s okay. I don’t mind!)