State of the Weight Wednesday: Just Breathe

It’s time for another week of State of the Weight Wednesday!

State of the Weight is a link-up about more than just the numbers on the scale. It’s about being healthy and making small, weekly changes you can live with.

Alright. I’m getting back into the groove of SOTWW. Slowly. I’m down another pound this week bringing my current weight to 197 and my total loss to 23 pounds since April.

Not too shabby and I’m quite happy with it. Thankyouverymuch.

It’s been difficult the past two weeks to focus on eating healthy when the last thing I’ve wanted to do was care about much of anything. But Saturday I had a rocking good time with some of our best friends that included drinking (a lot of) beer and eating great barbecue and that was part of the release I needed in order to get myself back to here where I’m ready to focus again.

Remember how I’ve been saying that SOTWW isnt just about losing weight? Okay, good. This is about to get a little frou-frou on you guys. So just hang with me, mmkay?

I went to yoga last night for the first time in about 6 weeks and it felt so good just to be there.

I almost didn’t go. I had a headache. I was tired. I was full from dinner. The kids were a mess. There were dishes. And laundry. And Lost. Excuses, excuses, excuses.

But I went.

As we started our Ujjayi breathing at the beginning of class, the instructor (who is amazing) reminded us to feel what we felt, whatever it was, and then focus on the sounds of our breathing and let that clear our minds.

There’s been so much worry and frustration and doubt in my mind and heart for the last few weeks, even before Daddy’s death. Last night I breathed out the stale air.

By the time we started the first pose, my mind was clear and my body was focused. For the first time in weeks.

As I moved I thought about how good it felt to feel my muscles stretching. How they would have that soreness today that meant they had been put to use.

And I breathed. In and out. Over and over. And I let go.

Part of why I’ve been eating like crap to deal with all of this is that I’ve forgotten to breathe. Metaphorically, of course. I haven’t hung on to the knowledge that at the end of the day I can’t control a lot of this.

I can’t make Emma sleep until 7:00. I can’t make Joshua eat regular people foods. I can’t bring my dad back to straighten the slant that exists in my world.

Every time I rolled my shoulders back to let go of the physical tension there I let go of some of the emotional tension too. As my muscles loosened up so did my heart and mind.

I woke up this morning feeling frustrated and rushed and have been running about 10 minutes behind all day long. But in the midst of it all I’m breathing. In and out. And it’s helping.

As much as my weight is important to SOTWW, and it is a huge part of this, living a healthier overall life is my goal. That means taking time to breathe and be. To take care of all parts of myself and not just how I look. I haven’t been doing a great job of that recently and I did last night. And I remembered why I liked it.

Because it’s healthy.

Weekly Goal(s): At least 2 more yoga classes, 3 days of cardio. Keep breathing through tough moments to stay focused.
Weight Goal: 31 lbs total; 8 lbs to go.

What were your successes or setbacks this week? What are your goals for next week? Leave it in the comments or join in the link-up! Please make sure to visit other links, too! Support is key!