And man, do we have big stuff today.
Blair is today’s guest blogger. Yep. THE Blair. As in, the mother of the blondest little baby boy on earth.
Blair and I met back in the day on The Bump, before it was The Bump. I got pregnant with Joshua about a month before she got pregnant with Harpie. And I remember being completely devastated when I learned that she’d lost Harpie. Completely. I was so thankful for the little life growing inside me, but at the same time, it didn’t seem fair that my pregnancy was going smoothly while so many around me, so many people I considered friends, were losing theirs.
I drifted away from The Bump after Joshua was born, and by that time, Blair was pregnant with Harrison.
When Blair came forward about her PPD/PPA, I kind of felt violated. How did this person that didn’t really know me, aside from our interaction on a message board, know so much about me? How was she in my head!?!
And then I felt sort of ashamed for not being more vocal about my story. For suffering in relative silence. Especially when there are SO many women out there, as this Guest-blog-a-palooza and the #PPDChat on Twitter have taught me. Why was I trying to go this alone?
So I reached out to Blair and asked if she’d like to team up with me and help organize a PPD/PPA Rally to blow the roof off of the silence and to coordinate it so that it coincided with May 18th, the day to blog about Mental Health. To let women know that it is okay to speak up. And she graciously agreed.
If you’re a reader of her blog, you know that she recently underwent a stay in a mental health facility for severe PPD and PPA. Her stay overlapped with this rally. In some ways, it’s fitting that while she was there working toward getting healthy, we were here, championing the cause.
When she got back, I sent her an email and asked if she still wanted to guest blog for me so the break yesterday was to give Blair time to figure out what she wanted to say. And rather than write something completely new and lengthy, she decided to share excerpts from the journal she kept while she was in the hospital. Here’s how the conversation went:
Me: Can I just say that I feel awful for bugging you about this when I know you’re trying to get things back together? Because I feel awful. I should send you cookies or something.
Blair: No, you are not awful! I will do whatever I can to raise awareness. Okay, if this is too debbie downer, TELL ME. I also included a second entry, which was written closer to when I was discharged from the hospital & I think it screams more hope.
I’m moved that she decided to share something so personal with me and my readers.
Her worry was that people would fear the treatment. And she writes, “IT WASN’T THAT BAD. AT ALL.”
Here is an excerpt from her first night’s stay.
Blair expressed that her biggest concern was that people would be scared by the idea of a stay in a mental hospital and wouldn’t seek treatment for their own PPD/PPA out of fear.
So, I’d like to take a minute to say that, while my own battle hasn’t been intense enough for me to need in-patient care, I’d like to think that I’d do whatever it takes to save my family, my marriage, my son, and my sanity.
DO NOT BE AFRAID.
There is hope.